Trying to learn how to swim.

I have never taken the easy road,
I don’t think it’s in my blood.
Maybe God has a different path for me to follow,
maybe I’m just stubborn
and follow the phrase
I said so many times when I was a kid
“I’ll do it myself.”
And let me tell you
I have.

Many of the things I’ve done.
haven’t been the smartest things.
But when I decide to do something,
I don’t wade in and swim on the surface;
no, I hold my breath
and dive deep down into the river.
When I come back up
gasping for air,
trying to swim back to shore,
its only then that I suddenly remember
I can’t swim.

As I try to doggy paddle
against the current to shore.
struggling to keep my head above the water,
there are hands that reach out,
to help me back to the shore,
the hands of my family and friends.
which pull me out of the river,
and wrap me in the blanket of their love,
and lend me their strength.
as they bitch me out
for being so stupid.

Though their words are harsh
and many times true,
I can see it in their eyes,
that terrible fear,
and it makes me sad,
cause I never wanted to hurt them.
I was just trying to learn how to swim.

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